Shelby

This past weekend Shelby reminded me that in 3 months she will be 11. Eleven! That can't be possible! I'm not sure which of my children I worry about the most but I worry about Shelby because she is so much like me. Eleven worries me because that is how old I was when I got my first boyfriend, and I constantly felt like I needed to have one until I met & married Chip. There were short spans without boyfriends but not often. I never felt "complete" without somebody. I look back and wonder how that happened because my sisters were basically the same way. Was it because of the abuse of my real dad? Or his death? I don't know but something happened that I don't want to happen to my Shelby. I went through my teenage years feeling like whether or not I had a guy defined who I was and I want her to know that is far from the truth. When I talk about college and what I would do different with my friends, I tell them that I would definitely worry less about the guys and have more fun with my friends. And that is what I pray that Shelby will do differently. I don't know how long I will be around to guide her with her choices so I pray that I am able to build her up while I can. I do know one thing I have done right is giving her Chip as her father. He is a great, caring, affectionate man. I don't think she will feel like she has to get her affection elsewhere. And I hope she looks for a man like him. If she does, she will not settle for guys who are players. Fortunately, Shelby still isn't showing any interest in boys. I know that it will change overnight. She is very open and honest with me right now which I also know that can quickly change. But I do hope that continues so that I can help her make better choices than I made. I don't want her to learn everything the hard way like I did!